Having
spent considerably longer than I would have wished at various
airports over recent months it has been hard to ignore the
increasing number of tattoos being displayed by people of all shapes
and sizes as they jet off or return from some exotic location. At
the turn of the last century Lydia the Tattooed Lady was an
attraction at a freak show, as someone who has never felt the urge to
express my personality with ink it is now me that it is feeling
like a freak.
Apparently
it is now called ‘body art’ - Hang on a minute! The Mona Lisa may
have sported a few dodgy moustaches in text books in her time but I
don’t recall her having a tattoo on her hand or face. Michelangelo
never felt the urge to adorn his statue of David with a tat. When you
create a masterpiece why spoil it with graffiti? Well that is my
excuse for not wishing to blemish my pristine torso. Aficionados may
argue that the complexity of some of the designs is art though for
most people the effect is more akin to street graffiti.
To
me, needles signify pain and there is no way I am going to permit
anyone to start poking holes in my body even if it is in the name of
art.
Most
tattoo parlours still remain tucked away in back streets together
with the dodgy taxi companies, questionable fast food outlets and
private clubs (so I am told). To obtain a license for tattooing or
skin piercing you need to demonstrate that you are a ‘fit and
proper’ person to run such an establishment. To my mind, that is
not sufficient proof of competence as a tattooist or as an artist.
Growing
up many of my uncles sported tattoos they collected during the war,
usually it was an anchor or the name of a loved one. War veterans
may not want to talk about their wartime experience but I have yet to
find one who did not want to talk about their tattoo.
Later
on I became aware that there was a trend for both men and women to have
discreet tokens tattooed on various parts of the body. Butterflies,
spiders, hearts, stars, devils and dolphins started to appear on
shoulders, ankles or wrists.
What
struck me at the time was the number of people who later came to
regret having the tattoo and either wished or took steps to have it
removed. If like me you have little confidence in the abilities of
those applying the tattoo then chances are you will have even less
faith in the abilities of those removing them.
In
the 80s, my employer maintained a strict policy on customer facing
staff that while tattoos were permitted they were not allowed to be
on show, which effectively meant that you needed to wear a jacket or
long sleeve shirt if you were talking to a customer.
‘Tatu’
means a marking in Tahitian and they have been used for various
purposes ever since Neolithic times. Some times they were used as
badges with a particular significance, some times as ornamentation.
When I look at the extent to which some people have taken the current
trend it would seem to me to be less of a fashion statement than a
sign of prosperity. It is hard sometimes to determine when a
professional footballer scores a goal and removes his shirt, is he
celebrating the goal or demonstrating his wealth by showing off his
latest artwork?
Warriors
used to have tattoos signifying their bravery. One of my school
inmates glorified in the self-proclaimed hard-man monicker ‘Bone
Crusher’ (which us mere mortals took to mean some ugly encounter
with a chicken’s wish bone). He was the sort of child that only a
mother could love, which I guess is why he had the word ‘Mum’
tattooed on his bicep. Those less kind would claim that it was a
demonstration of the boundaries of his limited vocabulary. I mean,
how ‘hard’ do you have to be to have the word ‘Mum’ tattooed
on your arm? Maybe ‘Rhino Shagger’ or ‘I eat puppies’ would
convey a more menacing image. Even the words ‘Bone Crusher’ would
have made more sense, though he was not particularly macho and I
don’t remember his biceps being particularly well defined anyway.
Smart
money would say that ‘Mum’ would have objected to such a tattoo.
I
can only imagine that there is an incredible amount of time needed to
complete a large artwork and I suspect that it does not come cheap.
From comments I have read most people choose to have tattoos that
have a special significance or meaning in their life. Given that
people’s circumstances and views change throughout their lives
having something so permanent etched onto your body has the potential
of coming back to bite you (possibly in the very place that the
artwork is placed). Talking of which, I wince every time I see Cheryl
Fernandez-Versini on TV. Not that I have anything against her or the
floral tribute that covers her posterior, it is just that my granny
used to have a pair of cushions with almost exactly the same design
on. They too had a crack down the middle. Over the years they lost
their shape and started to sag, which regrettably is what will happen
to Cheryl’s backside in the fullness of time.
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Who
knows what prompts people to have a tattoo or why they select a
particular design, for now the best I can think of is, as Cheryl
would say, ‘Because I’m worth it’.
